Why your parents don’t watch TV

Ever wonder why your parents don’t seem to like television?

Parents LOVE television. But every parent also knows that once they start watching something, you’re going to come in and start whining about what YOU want to watch.

Parents hate whining children more than they like television. Hate. I’m using the word “hate” here. Mathematically, it can be expressed as:

H = WK >> E = TV

Or: “the hatred of whining kids are much greater than the enjoyment of television.”

So, in order to have just a moment’s peace, without the incessant yapping of whining kids, parents, through the ages, have steadily given up television.

This explains the amount of research dedicated to the detrimental effects of television on children:

it makes them violent;
it makes them fat;
it lowers their math scores

All of these studies were conducted by parents who’d had enough of the whining and needed a “legitimate” excuse to tell their bratty kids why the TV is off.

So, thanks a lot children. Once again, you’ve ruined it for everyone.

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