We can safely go ahead file this under the “Odd-Stuff-I-Bought-This-Week” file: Antarctic Press‘ Time Lincoln #1: Fists of Fuhrer.
Holy Presidents, Batman!
Here’s the set-up (from the inside cover):
“On April 14, 1865, at Ford’s Theater, Abraham Lincoln both became and escaped becoming the victim of a man from another ers.
During his own lifetime, Jozef Stalin had plumbed the occult secrets explored by the mad monk Rasputin and discovered the Void, a formless dimension that allowed one to travel through time by mere contact with it. By studying and remaining in touch with the Void, the Russian dictator gained ever more control over time, eventually dubbing himself Void Stalin!
However, Void Stalin always found himself and his minions thwarted by a valiant team of heroes who also knew the void. Consisting of such historic greats at Ben Franklin, George Washington Carver, Isaac Newton and Albert Einstein, they were led by the stalwart Time Lincoln! For much of his career Void Stalin believed Lincoln’s death to have been faked, but eventually, the Void told him it not only happened, but that Stalin himself was the killer!
Yet, as Stalin prepared to do in his nemesis preemptively, Lincoln was saved … by Lincoln! In the end, Time Lincoln met his death, thus preserving history, but Abraham Lincoln, touched by the Void, was pulled into it and out of time, to begin the lifetime he would live in his final hour!”
Got it? I read it twice and still don’t, thus proving my Theory of Bulliteracy:
if you write something confusing — but syntactically and grammatically correct — people will give up and assume you’re correct.
Anyway, how can you NOT be curious? Of course, this isn’t the only time Mr. Lincoln has been the hero (as this Google search shows); after all, while Jesus hates zombies, Lincoln hates werewolves (as pictured below).
Hmmm … now THAT may warrant further investigation. So let me just go ahead and apologize to my wife ahead of time … in case I get pulled into the Void … or at least wasted consumerism!