How to run fast like Tom Cruise

I’m not sure if Tom Cruise is the fastest celebrity alive, but he certainly looks like it, which, I guess, is half the battle.

Now, that movie magic can be yours! In just four easy steps, you, too, can look like you’re running as fast as Tom Cruise.

  • Step 1: Karate chop hands. Nothing says “Quick” like slicing your way through the air. Keep fingers extended during running and negate extra friction that hinders other “fist”-runners.
  • Step 2: Tippy-toes. Not only does running on your tip toes make you raise your knees (which looks faster), it doesn’t sound as loud as those slower, full-footed runners. That fft-fft-fft sound from your tip-toes is softer and makes you seem quicker.
  • Step 3: Elbow action. Alternating tight with flailing elbows serves two purposes. First, they keep the karate chop hands moving, mesmerizing the viewer. Secondly, they get caught in your untucked shirt or blazer. This secondary action forces the tail of the shirt or blazer to shuffle from side to side, making it seem like your clothes are having a hard time catching up. You’ll be literally outrunning your clothes.
  • Step 4: Grimace. Running fast is hard work — look like it. The strain on your face echoes the strain your muscles are experiencing as they slice through the air and stay ahead of your shirt tail. Try out running grimaces in the mirror in order to find the most effective look of strain for you.

There you have it. Practice each of these four easy steps in your home during commercials and, in no time at all, people will ask you how to outrun a sandstorm or stay ahead of the mob or make it through a barren Times Square in a flash or leave Pre-Crime Officers in the dust or whiz past blood-sucking aliens or … well, you get the picture.

 

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5 thoughts on “How to run fast like Tom Cruise

  1. Pingback: Off-topic movie review: Jack Reacher | The 10-Minute Ramble

  2. Pingback: Off-topic movie review: Mud | The 10-Minute Ramble

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